Special

So much suffering comes from making things special. And yet, despite knowing this to be true, I can't help myself but make things special and want special things.

Today is my birthday, it is a special day. Because it is a special day, I have expectations of what should happen today. People should be extra nice to me. I should have a special dinner, a special party or outing. People who love me should call and tell me so. I should get gifts and today should be good in general.

It's these expectations of specialness that lead to disappointment, sadness and suffering. If someone I love wrote me a nice card on any given day, it would make my day and bring me tons of joy. Because it is expected today, such actions are less valuable, they are expected and required.

Isn't that funny? By making today a special day, I'm actually setting it up for disappointment, and suffering. We do that same with events, people, things.

Expectations of a special person means that we require things from a friend or lover who we wouldn't require from someone who isn't "special". These expectations of the person and relationship lead to disappointment, stress, and suffering.

Why then do we deem things special? Why do we want to be special? If I could just be open to things as they are rather than as I label them and expect them to be, I would find much more pleasure, acceptance and joy in experiencing them. No expectations so no disappointment or loss.

Easier said than done, but worth exploring and working toward. Deeming the world and all within it special and equally worthy of love, time, and acceptance.