Unconditional Love

I've been seeing more clearly how my love is often very conditional. I had and still do have a list of things I want from people in order to deem them worthy of my love. I'm trying to work with that. Pema talks about using compassion to melt attachment, especially in love relationships. I feel like it's really important to my future happiness to find a way to be less attached and more unconditionally loving. I need to get better at loving people regardless of whether they are doing what I want or how active they are in my life. I do deep down just want everyone to be happy, but my selfish desire of "me first (my happiness first)" often takes over.

My ego argues that I need to get mine first. I need to make sure I get what I want, need, etc. before giving away my love. The problem, of course, is that if we all do this, why would anyone ever love unconditionally. Why would anyone love period? We never get all that we want and need from anyone. It's the nature of being human.

I need to learn to love first. The only love I have is the love I give. This trying to get love from others is hopeless and fruitless. I already have all the love I need. I don't need it from anyone else. Work on cultivating that love and letting others be as they are. Love them exactly as they are without expectations of what you might get in return. That is the true path to happiness.